Whenever we approach a crossroad in life, it’s a chance to choose a new beginning, but a new beginning means starting again from scratch. What we really need is the strength to move forward. There is a sense of accomplishment in looking back to see how far you’ve come. Seeing the rough terrain that you have come through and marveling that you had the strength, courage, and determination to make it through.
As you look back, you see silhouettes of those along the way who’ve helped you make it through; family, friends, strangers, all cheering you on. As you look ahead, you see a patch of smooth ground; but beyond that, in the distance, there is more rocky ground, rough terrain, and a dark unknown.
You now question your next move. Do you forge ahead, not knowing what you will encounter? Or do you go back to where things are safe and familiar, and you know what to expect? After all, you have already proven that you can handle the latter.
I, like many others, have found myself at these crossroads many times in my own life. Now, as I approach my 67th year , I have come to realize that it is not a “new beginning” that we seek in life, but rather, a new perspective. A better view from a different vantage point as we rise to new heights.
As I continue to overcome the trials that life has for me and advance to new levels of tolerance and understanding, there are “aha” moments at which I realize I now have a better view of the bigger picture that is my life.
At each plateau, I arrive at not only greater clarity regarding my own path, but deeper empathy for those still struggling to find their own way.
I am saddened by the vast number of young souls who have, and will, reach a point where they feel they cannot go on any longer. They have become tired, weary, and they just give up. Perhaps they feel it’s not worth it; or maybe they believe that things will never get better. I do not blame them, nor do I judge them. Not everyone has it in them to go the distance.
In retrospect, I realize that I cannot see the world from another’s point of view. No matter how close I may stand to another person, no two individuals can occupy the same space at the same time. What from my perspective may seem hopeful, to another it may seem hopeless.
We each travel through this world on our own individual path, and no matter how many people surround us, we are ultimately alone. And that is ok. Because each of us has within, the innate ability to, not only survive, but to thrive.
If you are reading this and you are on the verge of throwing in the towel, do one last thing for me before you give up. Find a quiet place —a room, a closet, a corner, it doesn’t matter. Get by yourself. Go over the events of your life—the hurt, the pain, the sorrows. Think of each one in detail. Let all the emotions they invoke come to the surface. Don’t fight it. Feel it all. Then, let go … cry. Cry hard and loud, if necessary. Let the tears and the snot run down your face without stopping.
Think about the people who you believe have wronged you and then, forgive them.
People are who they are, and there is nothing you can do about that. It is not even about you. If it had not been you they wronged, it would have been someone else. You learned from each experience, and it has made you who you are. There are some people who are in our lives to teach us hard lessons. They too, serve a purpose.
When you have cried all you can, and the tears have stopped, sit quietly with your eyes closed. Ask, in earnest, for that part of you that has been with you since the beginning, the part of you that knows you better than anyone else, to give you the answers that you need. Then, take as much time as you need… and listen.